Austin is weird, Houston is hot,
San Antone is peachy but El Paso's not.
Oh no, don't go to El Paso.

Just driving by on the interstate,
The view is nice but the smell sure ain't.
Oh no, don't go to El Paso.

The thing about El Paso, it don't smell like a rose.
It smells like a cow took a dump in your nose.
Oh no, don't go to El Paso.